I am sure many have heard the term before. Good for you.
What have you done for a young person forced to use crutches?
A young woman who a spare pair of glasses would mean the world.
Or someone who is in constant, agonizing pain, every minute of every hour of every day
every week, of every month, of every year, and probably will be for life--and it is a burning physical pain-
one no one else can see, one no one else can see the flames shooting off her entire body;
And in the hospital, proper pain control being a dream to begin with,
A place you are supposed to have the right to have your pain is
relieved to the greatest degree possible-and to have that is a rarity-
Where conversations like this are commonplace:
You tell them you are in more pain-it is that you are a:
Nut case
Drug addict/druggie
Not to be trusted
If you still hurt; the doctor assumes you are drug-seeking-when
Usually if you are diagnosed properly, dream on
getting any other of your docs to buy it.
Or (my favorite); "You're way too young for all this!"
Your illness means you must be treated like a small child,
You ARE mentally a small child
You are mentally deficient
You cannot care for yourself physically or mentally
You cannot manage your own money/bills
You are basically, to sum up this part: a total fucking moron!
And when they find out otherwise-boy are they pissed!!!
Since my bipolar diagnosis, and any person with bipolar who goes through that period of irresponsible decision-making, or they get in trouble with drugs, alcohol or the law, hell, a combination thereof: But "normies" do it also, and in fact,
the halls of AA (and NA for the most part) are more full of "normies" than the "mentally ill."
But the mentally ill seem to be treated better than those in
chronic pain-or RSD: and no one-when you're in a hospital does anything but question-
No matter how good of a history you have given them!
And why is there still such a stigma to it?
But really, I don't know which is worse:
- Telling someone you have a mental illness, if that is the case
- Telling anyone you suffer chronic pain, OR
- BOTH
Well, as Mark Twain (and
others later) said, "The reports of my demise are greatly over-reported,"
and though he read a favorable account of his life, if my family wrote
it I would be a total lunatic who can't keep her house clean and what a
pigsty it is, and that I am a boil on the butt of humanity.
Naturally, I do the level best to
ignore this sort of BS, and anyone reading such trash would know that no human
being should be talked like that, and the exaggerations are as stupid as
they sound.
But on the medical aspect, I am now well hydrated (it took
almost the entire weekend, and I had a bunch of electrolyte imbalanced
they had to correct before anything can be done. I admit I am a WEE BIT
ticked off both with myself and the docs that (hospitalists) that
idk-maybe they were in cahoots with the family-and yesterday was one
GIANT nightmare (I have always made the request people let ME update and make calls, unless otherwise agreed (and it hasn't been), but if
there was acompetition, but Saturday between 8am and 10am, seven calls
were wearing me thin and I was not doing well, so out of the ROOM went
the phone so my dad, even after several messages-as has been done in the
past with success, he shows up-throws the light on, and like the
vampire I am, in addition to bad allodynia for lights/sounds, claiming
to understand (CRPS to that one) but my brain had been wonky on Friday
because my electrolytes were severely whacked-I was also exhausted of
FIVE MONTHS of being sick.
Progression:
 |
| Sunday |
Then suggests-no Happy Easter, zippo, that I
am not able to "live independently" as if he has any say in the
matter...so the RN's (God Bless them!) told him basically, "Get out-NOW,
or Security will give you a hand."
All the same, if he had made more
than one or two attempts to help out in 5 months? One of those times, I didn't have so much as a gallon of milk in the fridge-I told him (on a Thursday) as Instant Breakfast being about the only way for me to get calories. He said, "I'll see you Saturday;" when the convience store around the block has gallons of whole milk for $2.99; so I starved for 2 days. I slurped down the IB wheen I did get the following Sunday, and got sicker.
Then Asshole says I don't want to move.
But I won't look
backwards. I, contrary to his claim CAN'T WAIT to get the HECK out of
my apartment and into the new one, and another point he felt necessary
to attack with: I have said nothing for WEEKS that I can't wait. No, my
memory isn't PERFECT--but meds, etc are ALWAYS taken appropriately-very
anal on that mark.
Apparently though I am nearing 40 they think I am a
hapless MORON? All I can say about this--now that we are back on
track-is that a bit of advice: If you have "family issues," chances are
if you became unable to make healthcare decisions, they WILL go to your
next of kin (aka FAMILY) unless you LEGALLY specify otherwise. I can see
them, and it's very troubling, they would not allow a peaceful "exit"
and would either just withdrawl ALL CARE and allow me to go
painfully--and that is so disturbing. I have a form type of document,
but
anyone else who would know, I would love to know what (and where) to go
perhaps to make it specific, and I guess "Ironclad" that no one person
that is either a blood relative or MARRIED to, etc, be involved in AND
PART of my healthcare (or otherwise, psychiatric, for example; plug any
holes, I guess? (sorry about the length).
I went to http://www.legalzoom.com.
My papers are in order for a:
- Power of Attorney
- Advanced Directive
- Living Will
- Durable Power of healthcare attorney.
ALL DOCUMENTS, ESPECIALLY PERTAINING TO COMPETENCY MUST BE SIGNED BY A PHYSICIAN, WITTNESSED AND NOTARIZED!!!!
None of my famly is involved
