I hope that others are going to keep an open mind that Ketamine is not available (or affordable) to everyone with RSD. LOOK AT ME. Look beyond the end of your own nose.
Talk about full-body RSD in a state where no form of IV ketamine is available-the best thing you can do is smoke your meds--if you can find the cash to do it
I tried a TENS unit, fucking hated it, and ain't going down the road of some damned thing that puts out 100 times the fuckinng outpuut and if Ii get a lead slippage, Murphy's Law states it would be when the doctor is on weekend, and I would get seen in oh, like maybe a week, or two-possibly three.
I went to another site, all I did was open a thread--as many others have: In a "Need to vent" kind of thing, and I'd been there before, and next thing I know, whamo this guy--granted who's (grown) daughter (at his expense--they sold just about everything they owned to pay for it) made a very miraculous and incredible recovery-and a mite jealous? Yeah I am. Who wouldn't be when I am headed down the same road she was: constant headaches, skin sores--and thanks to lack of family support, and understanding that one week you may feel your heart breaking when words like "adult family home." Or Skilled nursing. I am not in any way suicidal but the thought of going somewhere that a fish tank is the closest thing to adult conversation. If anyone cleans it. I would rather die.
But some days I don't care~~pain being all that's on my mind; I can't eat or sleep; much as I'd like to, my tiny laptop being my one and only (best) distraction. Some days I feel that acidic burn on my whole leg: the tears won't freaking stop dammit!!! I want to smile. Some days just trying to take a real and true snapshot, where I don't take fifty before I catch half a smile where you can't see tears--or me choking them back
Why?
Where I am at? My own body is wasting away...never thought I'd have to fight so hard to gain weight back, and he's set up shop--it feels to some of us; as "Resident RSD Expert #1/Ketamine is the "only way." It can scar you permanently with memory loss~oh, but life sucked, so just forget it anyhow? It can cause serious psychiatric and "behavioral issues--awww, who cares: I was crazier than a shit-house rat before? Yeah, I am bitter: Every morning, my first conscious thought is PAIN, every night--if I sleep; my last conscious thought is pain.
And my parents aren't going to take a second or third mortgage on the house to relieve it. They run from it, and that hurts too!!!! If I sound better one day (usually because I've just taken something. My apartment manager has more compassion. You idiots, my life is never going to be the same.
PEG tubes. Tube feedings, TPN and lipids. 66 pound weight loss in four and a half months. Dental problems because anticonvulsant medications for nerve pain-into the thousands. And because of the unwanted, undesired weight loss.
Or to publically presume that in the US, we are backwards on ketamine; but I am in fact, subject to Medicare regulations, which equals for me: NO ketamine that they pay for. I live in a rotten neighborhood which wouldn't so much as sell a chocolate chip cookie to help me even get the topical--heck, people won't open their doors (rightfully so--safety issue where I live).
And those who are better off don't slow down around here--usually they speed up and don't go through any alleys. No bake sales or fundraisers to send a person for medical treatment.
I've only ever asked people to not presume they know what medications I am on, nor to condemn me for making choices that they do/don't. I had mentioned that my port goes in-they may have to use it part-time for IV nutrition. OK, I worked in healthcare: I know what comes with that--and there I was getting judged for it--and I would try ketamine--but my family is 100% unwilling, much of the time, to bring a gallon of milk--and yet, that is not the reason I have lost all this weight.....
I was simply asking for prayer, and if failing that, good wishes--I couldn't get it from someone I had been friends with, and publicly, he questioned my motives ("I'm not sure what you're looking for, but you might try hypnosis (guess what? I tried-couldn't focus and halfway through, was getting physically ill in the poor fellow's trash can) and goes on to say that otherwise MY daughter did it the ole [sic] fashioned way with ketamine.
YOU STUPID SOB: Why the inequality? Hypnosis for me cuz I'm 'poo folk, and you have a home to mortgage to GET Ketamine--whilst you still get to compare your perfect child to me?
- We are not related
- I am not, thankfully, especially if you compare your one child against everyone elses--who have used real traditional methods such as:
- Physio, Physical, and hydrotherapy--and used them successfully
You only taught your daughter about instant gratification. And
to put her life on the line to get it. I am in the situation because
some ER doc doesn't know to properly care for a blood blister.
Adults can be just as cruel as children, if not more so. I am glad I'm not his child if he compares everyone to her as the "one and only."
Granted, many parents-myself no exception see their child as not an extention of myself; but one to teach how to make their way in this world. I leave my son (also now grown) out of the spotlight--for this reason.
Not on CNN.
Many prefer privacy--not the spotlight-and only document and share their experiences so someone else will benefit: if not from awareness.
You will receive no further attention from me--you have stolen the spotlight already--btw: plenty of people already think you're an ass anyhow
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